I will no longer put anything in this world before my husband. He and the God we serve are the light and love of my life. They have given me the love and freedom I've been seeking all my life... which is the one thing I could not understand was under attack from the time I was in my mothers womb.
It is true what the Bible says... that we are called from beginning of time itself. I didn't really understand before... what it was to be called from a very early age. Now as I look back... even before I came to ministry... even before I made the personal decision to fully surrender to God... people could see something inside me... the lamp of God... and they would come to me, seeking answers, help... whatever it was they were in need of. And me trying to be all I could to help (far before I ever really knew why) would give, give and give... and do and do and do some more... and people would take what they needed... and continue on... and again I say- I didn't even understand why. I just knew it felt good to be needed... wanted... and I viewed that feeling of being wanted, as being loved.
What I know now is that was NOT love... not truly. Whether they did it to be hurtful or truly just because they needed help (which was mostly the case), twisting the high it gave me into love was never the purpose.
Again... it's true what the Bible says...
"If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to the flames that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing."
We miss this every time.
I gave and gave and gave... my body to those flames. And I was on fire... burning from exhaustion, but even more so from the bitterness I felt when I couldn't receive the praise or recognition I so needed, in order to know "I'd done well"... or "done it right" - or truly, that "I was loved."
I did not HAVE love... I had denied myself access to receiving the complete and unconditional love... of self, and most importantly, of God... that I might trust Him as He worked to show me how He saw me... how He loved me. Blinded by self-ridicule, I looked for love in approval... appreciation... and acknowledgement. But even if I got just a piece of what I thought that looked like, my soul knew it was still wasn't enough.... and so I worked harder... dove deeper... and over time, even when God gave me a man to love me through my mess, I was still seeking approval... some "vision" of success equivalent to what I thought love and admiration looked like in order to be real... whole... true.
What a mess.......
Until... He took me off into the wilderness to spend more time with Him... and more time with just... me.... until He taught me how to properly, holistically take care of my tired mind... my weakening body and confused soul... until He showed me my focus was on all the wrong things... and all I needed to do to fix it, was look at Him, listen to Him... and let Him tell me and show me that I AM loved... and have more love than I could ever even hold inside of me... and that all I have to do to be whole, is believe Him... and walk with this truth as my protection... because truly... there's nothing to be afraid of... I am who I am inside of Him. He doesn't care about any of the things I try to do to be enough. He just wants me to know I'm safe... here in His presence. And His presence is all I need.
“Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.”
So He said, “Come.” And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, “Lord, save me!”
And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased.
So... back to now... now, that my eyes are wide open, they won't close again. I won't close myself off to this place He's brought me to... because He is the only reason I can see, feel and know who I am and where I'm going. He is the one who opened me up and showed me the light in my life... the light inside my protector... and the one who knew and loved all of me before I knew who I was and how to love myself... my husband, Entyse Pusch-Zuniga.
Consider this... if Peter's shadow was to heal the sick, He had to face the light... right?
A great part of my own healing has been this- I now know that I do not have to be everything for everyone... and by knowing this, I am free to just be who I am and who I desire to be.
And I just want to be free... to follow God and the beautiful man He created, just for me... to be close to him, that we may birth the beautiful children we've been praying for without ever even holding them in our arms.
And all of this... that I might expose them, to the light of God... the light of their father... and the light of LIFE... so they might walk into that glory with their own little feet... and become whoever it is He created them to be - faithfully, without fear.
World changers. Whole. Happy....... world shakers. Mark my words. Destiny is on the horizon.
So... from now on... I will pour into the space He's provided... and I invite you to drink here... to see here what He's shown me...
Today... He's not only illuminated within me His peace... but the man I love... who protects it.
The Native Road.
A word for the prophet...
Some people will not be able to stand the fact that they have to follow you. But it’s okay… let it be so- you are not in control of the will of God. It is not about your will… but His. Let your love be patient. Be humble, allowing Him to say and do as He must… and WILL… through you. Let the fire and power COME in the night. Light up the darkness!
Act… as instructed. Be humble… allowing people to feel how they feel, praying God will bring them into alignment with the vision He gave you for all life on earth... in this present moment. You were Created by God for such a time as THIS. …yet, be careful not to disrupt His process and theirs. Be patient. He is their savior… you are His chosen vessel. You will speak… in the chosen place at the designated time… in the shown way… make way prophet of God. “Make My paths straight!” says the Lord God Almighty. And all good things come to those who wait. Humility requires patience. 🙏🏾 Love all… show thyself approved by your choosing love, though they may stumble and fall. The patient rise with the damned, witnessing their heart, making way through encouragement. And then they let go... giving room for God to help them grow. This is the act of the righteous call… the just and POWERFUL. 🔥 This IS the fire of God. Love, truth and transparency. Respect and admiration shall follow. Thus, above all, trust God’s PERFECT peace to guide you. A lamp unto your feet and His path before you. Guided in His PERFECT will, trusting His PERFECT timing… come what may. Trust Him when you even doubt yourself… or them. He is ruler over all things. Even over Pharoah - who would not worship Him. 🙏🏾
Wait. Be watchful. Resilient. Ever present… inside the perfect will and trust of God.
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
And yet... if you find yourself on the other side of this statement- resentful, bitter, heart hurt… jealous… angry… having malice and hatred fuming from within your heart… breathe again. Have patience bestowed upon you, creating a resilient heart beating within your chest… come what may. 🙏🏾
Wait. On. God. For He cares for YOU. 🙏🏾💙
You CAN AND WILL have the promises He set forth for you. ALL OF THEM. Be HUMBLE. Trust Him above all perceived persecution, doubt, fear, worry… strain and struggle… allow YOURSELF access to His will. All is not always as it seems. Be patient… be careful what you judge from the lens of fear, resentment, worry and bitterness… pain and isolation. Impatience will have you seeing double… causing you to become distracted by the fray. And you may stumble… and fall.
BUT- you are still a child of God… and all good things still come to those who wait. Do not fear for He is close to the broken hearted. He is near you now… if only you should choose to listen. Chin up. Look up… breathe. Ask Him to reset, rebalance, reshape your heart, revealing to you any iniquity that you and He may together, lay aside any and every weight. You can be whole again… if you so choose.
Wait... 🙏🏾💙 and find your way to truth. To peace. To happiness and sincere joy, love and freedom. To family… free will is yours for the taking… the choosing is hidden within the asking.
Kill the snare- the voice that says, “Don’t you dare.” Dare to dream again! Awaken the voice within- that slumbers within resentment… folding the arms… come undone.
The choice is still yours… today. And now… forever.
But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
More is coming.
Entyse Brian-Matthew Pusch-Zuniga,
the Native Road.
For I have called you. I have called you, set you apart for a reason... for a day, for a season, for a life such as this. A time such as these. You are CALLED. Sent. "SET A-PART." for you have a key, vital role to play in the coming days, weeks, nights and seasons... the fog is risen and I am all around you... and them.
Season... you are surrounded in Consuming Fire.... light the match- be the flame as you thrive inside His light.
Season... the salt of the earth... set apart for a purpose.
See, I have risen and it is time you come... and call them... season, MINE.
I HAVE risen among you.